NonVerbal by Molly Zenk
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Non-Verbal is inspired by a true story and tells the life of severely autistic Emerson Rayne from her point of view. Emerson lost her ability to talk at the tender age of fifteen months old. Now, at the age of fourteen, Emerson is trying to navigate the difficult world of middle school. Middle school is tough enough as she deals with bullies, friendships, and the stress of being a teenager but for Emerson she must also deal with over protective stressed out parents and stressed-out teachers. She tries to remain good Emerson so she does not stress everyone out but finds that sometimes bad Emerson cannot help but lose control. Sometimes she cannot fight the urge to run away or eat the things that she knows that she should not eat. Sometimes the bugs crawl on her skin and she cannot stop scratching. Sometimes she feels like her body is on fire and she tries to make it stop. Having a daily routine usually helps to keep Emerson grounded and from having outbursts but sometimes the sensory overload from the bright lights and loud noises at school set her off. Now for some reason she is having outbursts that lead her to self-harm and she seems mentally and emotionally unstable. It is up to Emerson’s parents to try to keep her safe and find her the help and support she needs in both the health and education systems.

This was an absolutely beautiful and moving story that tells the point of view of someone who has ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder, an intellectual disability, and a sensory processing disorder. We see firsthand from her point of view life through Emerson’s eyes and although she is unable to speak, she has a voice and wants to be heard. We see the struggles and challenges she faces everyday as she fights the urge to do things like run, run, run. How she so desperately wants to be good so she does not worry those around her but cannot control how she reacts to certain stimuli in her environment. Bullies, loud noises, bright lights, and straying from her routine all set Emerson off and she is unable to stop from reacting. Good Emerson turns to bad Emerson, and she is saddened that she has worried those that love her and care for her. Emerson’s parents do everything they can to protect her, get her the help she needs, and show her that they love her. It was easy to empathize with Emerson and her parents with the struggles they all faced. A touching story that really gave insight on the dynamics surrounding those that have ASD and the daily struggles and challenges they face. A poignant, thought provoking and heartfelt read.

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